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Giving Thanks

  • Writer: Patricia Faust
    Patricia Faust
  • Nov 22, 2023
  • 3 min read

Giving Thanks


To my readers around the world, I want to talk about a holiday celebrated in the United States, Thanksgiving. The event that Americans commonly call the “First Thanksgiving” was celebrated by the Pilgrims after their first harvest in the New World in November 1621. This feast lasted three days and was attended by 90 Native American Wampanoag people and 53 survivors of the Mayflower. (Wikipedia). It is a day dedicated to gratitude.


My question is — in these tumultuous, chaotic times, can we dig deep enough to experience gratitude? And how do you do that? Here are seven suggestions on navigating gratitude when you just don’t feel like it.


1. Don’t Focus on Feeling Grateful

a. There is a common misconception that you must feel grateful to be grateful. According to neuroscientist and coach Alexander Korb, Ph.D., “You can’t control your feelings, and focusing on feeling grateful will often make you feel ungrateful.” What’s more helpful is to acknowledge the positive parts of your life, says Korb. “As you practice directing your focus, and actions towards the things you’re grateful for, the feelings will follow eventually.”


2. Acknowledge the Awful

a. Gratitude doesn’t turn a blind eye to heartbreak. You can both honor your pain and highlight a positive sliver. In challenging times, Sophia Godkin, Ph.D., a health psychologist suggests completing this sentence: “I don’t like that _________________ but the fact that____________ isn’t all that bad.”

b. Because some things might not have an upside, don’t force yourself to come up with one. Instead, try shifting to finding opportunities or benefits in a different challenge.


3. Stack Your Gratitude

a. Creating a new habit — no matter how small — is hard, especially around the holiday season when it seems like there is already so much to do. The key is to add a mini gratitude ritual to an existing solid habit.

b. You might reflect on three good things as you’re brushing your teeth, washing your hands, drinking a morning cup of coffee, or turning on your car. Known as habit stacking, adding a new practice to an already established habit boosts your chances of sticking to it every day.


4. Think Small

a. We often think that gratitude requires appreciating massive things like a vacation, a new job, or a big bonus. Indeed, it is helpful to start your gratitude practice with the basics, such as giving thanks for food, electricity, and clean water, says Lisa M. Brown, Ph.D., director of the Trauma Program and the Risk and Resilience Research Lab at Palo Alto University.


5. Look for Signs of Hope

a. Even when life seems bleak, there is hope, compassion, and love — if we look for it. As you move about your day, look for signs of hope in your own community. Seek out hopeful stories online and jot down the inspiring, uplifting things you find.


6. Give Thanks for Others

a. Expressing your gratitude can boost your mood and your relationships. One study found that participants who penned and delivered a gratitude letter to another person felt happier and less depressed. Another study found that on days those participants felt more grateful for their partners, they were more thoughtful and responsive to their needs.

b. When expressing your appreciation, it’s important to be specific with your kind words.


7. Savor a Sweet Memory

a. Reflecting on positive memories can help us to re-experience those positive emotions in the present moment. Happy memories can boost the production of serotonin in the brain, helping foster positive emotions.

b. To harness these effects, Korb suggests thinking about your favorite moment from the past few months — anything from a fun activity to a connection-building conversation. Use your senses to re-experience the memory.

c. Practicing gratitude right now might feel unnatural and inauthentic. But when we look around, we notice the genuine good that does exist — whether it’s a hot bowl of soup or a kind gesture.


Adapted from 7 Ways to Be Thankful — Yes, Even Now

By Margarita Tartakovsky

https://www.mequilibrium.com/resources/7-ways-to-be-thankful-yes-even-now/












 
 
 

Comments

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March was an unusual month for me.  Normally I work on articles, give presentations and generally just stay tuned to what is going on in the field of aging.  This month I “learned” a lot.  Last year I learned how to write a book.  At the time I took the course I thought it would just be a natural extension of all the writing I had done over the years.  WRONG!!  The actual writing of the book was the easy part.  Putting it together into a book was difficult for me.  The course gave me step by step lessons on constructing a book.  Then editing and formatting were just as challenging.  On June 7 last year the book was published!  It was one of the most satisfying days of my writing career. 

Naturally, when you self-publish, you do not have a publisher promoting the book and getting it in the right categories for best sales on Amazon.  That was crushing because I really didn’t know to appropriately market it.  I am a brain health person!  In December of last year, I purchased a marketing program that is based on statistics.  I am technical minded and so this approach made sense to me.  The course is almost completed.  Can’t wait to see if it improves sales!

The next step I am looking at is recording an audiobook.  This is another venture I knew nothing about.  But I am already tagged on Facebook for marketing of audio book programs.  Facebook picks up everything.  Now my husband was creative director for an advertising agency and when I told him I purchased another class – he couldn’t believe it.  “This was my business.  I know how to do recordings, why didn’t you ask me?” Well, I knew he was an expert in that business, but this audiobook needs to meet all the criteria that Amazon requires for publication.  So, he can take care of the recording part of this audiobook, and I will navigate the process of meeting Amazon’s requirements.  We worked on the book together like this. 

Then I talked with some coaching experts on the viability of starting group teaching programs.  Reading The Boomer Brain book and implementing the Brain Healthy Lifestyle have two entirely different outcomes.  This lifestyle is important to maintaining high cognitive function throughout the later years of our lives.  Look for updates as to when I will roll this program out.

My last learning endeavor was attending a two-day bootcamp for Speakers.  I am really excited about what I learned there.  That is a late this year or next year project, but it is one I am really looking forward to.

 

What Is Happening in April?

The American Society on Aging is having their annual conference in Orlando Florida April 21-24.  This is the largest multidisciplinary conference on aging and the annual conference for Members of ASA.  I have attended a number of these conferences throughout the years, and it is consequential.  Keynote speakers and special events are focused on combating ageism in our society.  Although this is a professional meeting, the attendees come from all aspects of aging services.  They have their work cut out for them this year!

April is Stress Awareness Month.  We should be aware of stress every month and understand how we can break the stress cycle.  These are stressful times, and we need to protect ourselves

Here is a positive one “April is National Volunteer Month”.  When I am working with new retirees who don’t know what to do, I talk to them about volunteering. It is important to have a purpose after you leave the workforce.  There are so many nonprofits who need help in all aspects of their organizations.  It is a perfect way to give back.

Finally – It was Opening Day for the Cincinnati Reds – the oldest major league team in the nation.  Cincinnati takes that responsibility seriously.  There is always an Opening Day Parade through downtown to the Ball Park.  Huge crowds line the streets and every year there is talk of making it an official holiday.  Schools and employers look the other way when there is an empty desk.  No matter what the outcome of the game is, there is so much joy, and you can feel that energy.  I am fortunate that I get to experience that.  We all need some joy right now. 

Enjoy your April.

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